I'm 28 this year, and I feel like I'm just starting to figure out what I want from life. I've spent too many years of my life constantly trying to please other people. Always too afraid that who I really am would never be enough. I always need a second opinion, always wanted to get confirmation that my decisions were okay. I've always prided myself in being independent, someone who did not need to depend on others, yet I second-guess every decision I make, needing confirmation because I was never sure what I would be doing would be okay (with other people). I am just someone who never got comfortable in her own skin. 28 years of life, and I have yet to be comfortable. I've never been good enough. I needed to be... Smarter. Thinner. Fatter. More outgoing. Less talkative. All contradictions, just to say that I was never just enough. And just shy of my 30s, I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever feel like I am fine the way that I am.
I'm starting the rest of my life today. And I don't want to waste another moment believing that the only way to happiness is pleasing other people, or tiptoeing around their feelings as though mine were somehow less significant.....
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